Signs - August 11th, 2007

So,

I was going to write on and on about how poorly I've communicated what I actually spend all my time doing, and how crazy/active life here is. But as I began to select photo highlights from the Dandanongs, Mornington Peninsula, Barmeh Millewa, Warrnambool and others, I was struck by the large collection of bizarre signage I'd collected photos of. Maybe these can give a glimpse of how truly messed up this island is...

Sign One: Ballarat Animal Preserve

Hmmm...Sounds pretty nasty. All that "lightning-fast" stuff, and the "20 young" thing. Waitwaitwait.. "Common"?! Welcome to Oz.




Sign Two: Mornington Peninsula

You've probably seen this on my Facebook site, but I think what I really need to clarify is that I took this photo in a national park. I'd hate to see what the signs for littering look like.

Sign Three: Nepean Military Base

Ummm...geee...I dunno...mmmm....I mean, I don't to be a promise breaker...

Sign Four: Warrnambool Estuary

Come see the World-Famous Historic Hopkins River Bridge! Oh no, wait...





Sign Five: Warrnambool coastline

Or: Please Keep Mindful of Sea Monsters

Sign Six: Dandanong Highway

Not much here for most of you folks, but for a certain new puppy dog my family just got who shall remain unnamed, this sign goes out to you. Don't be pee on my stuff man, it's not cool. Actually, that last bit goes out to all of you, seriously.

Sign Seven: The White Lotus Restaurant

Now, Melbourne restaurants are delicious, and the ol' Lotus here has got to be one of my favorites; but I will tell you one thing, and you had best listen closely: It doesn't matter who you think you are, you do not try to sneak cake into Mr. Lee's restaurant. There is a cakeage fee for a reason, and if you don't respect that or maybe think it's a little funny, he will fuck your foreign ass up.

Sign Eight: Fishtales Restaurant

Here you are Bob. This one is all for you. I asked some people where I could find a good vegan restaurant, and you know where they sent me? To a place that sells 'effin spiders. I am seriously done with the cuisine in this country.

Anyways everybody, that should tide you over for a couple days, have fun.